नारी प्रति गिद्धे दृष्टि त्याग गर ! 

 

नारी पृथ्वी हुन् l नारीको हृदय बिशाल हुन्छ र ममताकी खानी हुन् l उनिसंग सहनशीलता र धैर्यता छ l प्रशान्त महासागर झैँ शान्त स्वभाव भएकै कारण यिनीलाई पृथ्वीसंग तुलना गरिन्छ l भनिन्छ हजारौ काल अघि नारी प्रधान समाज थियो l यिनै पुरुषहरुको जालझेल र छलकपटबाट नारीहरुलाई किनारा लगाउदै बिकुल फुकी पुरुष प्रधान समाज भनि स्व : घोषणा गरे l पुरुष प्रधान देश भनि केहि मुलुकलाई उच्चारण गरिएता पनि एक्काईसौ शताब्दीमा यो कुराले मान्यता प्राप्त गर्दैन किनभने हरेक मुलुक बिकासको चरम बिन्दुमा पुगी सकेका छन् र यस्तो सोचाईमा अल्मलिदैनन l 

 

नारी र पुरुष समान छन् ,नारी न त पुरुष भन्दा ठुली छे न पुरुष नारी भन्दा साना छन्,न नारी उच्च छे या न नारी निचा छे किनभने नारीको आफ्नै आत्म सम्मान र पृथक पहिचान छ lउ बिना त जीवनको चक्र नै चल्दैन lभनिन्छ जुन घरमा नारी हुदैनन् त्यो घरमा भगवानले पनि बास गर्दैनन् l नारी रुपमा हामीले कैयौ ईस्वरको रुपमा पुज्दछौ lयहि नै सवालको जवाफ हो lहिन्दु धर्म शास्त्र अनुसार पौराणिक कालमा गार्गीले त्यस समयका प्रकाण्ड विद्वान र ऋषि मुनिहरुलाई तर्क र बिबेकले हराएको बिबेचना गरिएको छ अनि नारी कसरि पुरुष भन्दा पछाडी हुन्छे lनारी स्नेह कि खानी, सहनशीलता कि साक्षात देबीकि रुप हुन्  lनारी, जसलाई समाजको आधा आकाशका रुपमा हामी मान्दछौ ,कयौं नारीहरु पुरुषलाई उछिनेर एक कदम अगाडी पुगिसकेका छन् l पितृसत्तात्मक सोच र चिन्तनका खाल ओडेका पुरुषहरुको दानबी हर्कत कारण हजारौ बर्ष देखि कैयौ चेलीबेटी चरम यातनाका सिकार भएका छन् l तिरस्कारका अनगिन्ती आशुहरु पिउदै जिउन बिबस नारीहरु बाध्य पारिएका छन l तर समयले फड्को हानी सकेको छ र पुरुषको यहि संकुचित सोचको कारण नारी पटक पटक आक्रमणको सिकार हुन् पुग्दछन l पुरुषले नारी प्रतिको गिद्दे दृस्टी त्याग नगरे सम्म नारीले मुक्ति पाउन समय लाग्ने हुन्छ l

 

मार्च १९१० मा डेनमार्कको राजधानी कोपेनहेगनमा चीन, डोमेनिकन गणतन्त्र, अमेरिका ,ब्राजिल आदि १७ वटा देशका करिब १ सय जना महिला अधिकारकर्मीले 'महिलाविरुद्धको सामाजिक सोचमा परिवर्तन हुनुपर्छ, महिलाहरूले पनि सामाजिक, आर्थिक एवं राजनीतिक क्षेत्रमा पुरुषसरह अधिकार पाउनुपर्छ भनि गरेको सम्मेलन पनि १०० बर्ष पुगी सक्दा पनि महिला हिँसाका घटनाहरु न्युनतम हुन् सकेका छैनन् lमुलकुमा नारी हकहित सम्बन्धि अधिकासं कानुन र नियम निर्माण भै सके पनि ब्यबहारिक रुपमा कम्जोर  छ र अझ पनि नारीलाई हेर्ने दृष्टिकोणमा आकास जमिनको फरक आएको छैन l महिला हिंसाको शिकार भै रहेका छन् lप्रधान मन्त्रि निवास ,बालुवाटारमा बिरोध र नाराबाझी भै रहदा पनि महिला प्रताडितको शिलशिला यथावत छ l चेलीबेटीले सुरक्षित महसुस गरि रहेका छैनन l बिहान हिडेकी छोरी बेलुका साँझ सम्म घर जनयुद्द काल झैँ फर्किन्छन कि फर्कीदैनन् भनि अभिभावक एकाग्रताको साथ प्रतीक्षा गरि रहेका हुन्छन lसुदुर पश्चिममा मानिने छाउपडीको कारण शिक्षित महिला नै पिढित छन् र घटना घटी रहेको रहेको छ l यसमा समाजका भनाउदा ठुला ठालुले जबर्जस्त लाद्ने कामको सहयोग गरि रहेका छन् l

 

प्रशासन मुक दर्शक भएर हेर्न बाध्य हुन्छ किनभने २०६३ पछि सबै कार्यकर्ता नेता भएका छन्  र सबैलाई प्रजातन्त्र लागेको छ l माथि आफ्नो पहुच भन्दै कारवाई गर्नेलाई सरुवाको पुर्जी थमाई दिने भन्दै सन्त्रासको वातावरण बनिदैछ lदानब स्वभाव भएका पुरुष ,आफ्नो सोच र बिचारमा परिवर्तन गर्न नसकेका पुरुषको कारण नारीहरु आतंकित छन् l जब सम्म यस्ता राक्षसी प्रवृति भएकाहरु समाजमा रहन्छन यस्ता कुकृत्य घटनाहरु घट्ने सम्भावना रही रहने हुन्छ lहास्मीलाई जिउदै जलाईएको घटनाले समस्त नेपालीलाई स्तब्ध बनाएको छ र नारी प्रतिको पुरुषको हेराई गिद्दे दृस्टीमा परिणत हुदैछ l

 

नारी प्रति पुरुषको सद्भाव र श्रदा सदैब उच्च रहनु पर्छ किनभने नारी कसैको छोरी ,कसैको बुहारी र कसैको आमा र कसैको दिदि तथा बहिनि हुन्छिन l भारतको दिल्लीमा घटेको घटनाले विश्वलाई रुवाई दिएको छ र संसार शोक मग्न छ lयस्तो कहिले नहोस् र नदोहोरियोस भनि एक ढिक्का भएका छन् lपिडित मृत २३ बर्षिय एक होनहार भारत आमाकी छोरी घोषणा भएकी छिन् र हृदयमा अनगिन्ती सपना बोकेर हिडेकी त्यो रात कालको मुखमा परिन l भारतमा नया बर्ष २०१३ नमनाउने घोषणा गरे र विदेशमा समेत मनाएनन केवल शुभचिन्तकहरु न्यायकि मुर्तिको फैसला सुन्न लालायित छन्  l संलग्न आरोपित पितृ सतात्मक सोच र चिन्तनबाट ग्रषित त्यी दानबहरु को गीद्दे दृस्टी कारण सिकारमा परिन lबलिवुडका सम्राट साहरुख खानले उक्त घटनाको टिप्पणी गर्दै आफु पुरुष भएकोमा लाज छ भनि विचार पोखिदिए l यो घटना सेलाउन नपाउदै दुई ठाउमा यस्तै घटना घटी रहेको संचार माध्यममा आएको छ l

 

यो घटनाले मेरो मानस पटलमा नेपाल आमाको एक सच्चा बिर र बहादुर छोरा बिष्णु श्रेष्ठको संस्मरण गरायो lचलचित्रमा भएको जस्तो नायक आई त्यो निर्दोष बालिकाको अस्मिता कसैले पनि बचाउन प्राणको बाजी लगाएनन र बिष्णु श्रेष्ठ जस्तो हजारौ छोराहरु नेपाल आमाले यस धर्तीमा जन्माउनु पर्दछ भनि यो पंक्तिकारको मस्तिस्कमा उब्जियो  l बिष्णु श्रेष्ठ भारतीय सेनामा कार्यरत पोखरा निवासी सिपाही हुन् lभारतीय सेनामा धेरै बर्ष सेवा गरि निबृतिवरण( अवकास प्राप्त )लिई नेपाल फर्कने क्रममा केहि बर्ष अगाडी भारतको गोरखपुर नजिक ४० जना डाकाले आफु चढेको रेलमा मच्चाएको आतंक र एक युवती प्रति गरेको दानवीय ब्यबहारले  कहिले नझुक्ने गोर्खालीको सच्चा सन्तान बनि नेपाल तथा नेपालीको शिर ठाडो पर्ने कामले गरे lउनीले देखाएको बहादुरता र साहसको उच्च कदर गर्दै भारत सरकारले सौर्यचक्र, बहादुरी पदक र सर्बोत्तम जीवनरक्षा पदकबाट सम्मान गरेको छ lबिष्णु श्रेष्ठले एक युवती प्रति डाकाहरुले गर्न खोजेको अपमानजनक कुकृत्य ,आफ्नो मातापिताको सामुने अस्मिता लुट्न खोज्ने र चिकित्षा बिषयमा अध्ययनको तैयारीमा यात्रामा हिडेकी युवती प्रति देखाएको पासविक हर्कत तथा उनको चित्कारले वीर गोर्खालीको मन थाम्न सकेनल आफ्नो जीवनको पर्वाह नगरी केवल नारी मुक्ति र नारीको अस्मिता जोगाउनुबाहेक कुनै बिकल्प नरही ४० जनाको जत्थासंग केवल खुकुरीको भरमा विकासे मुलाकाटे झैँ काटी कोतपर्व झैँ रगतको खोलो बगाए पश्च्यात डाकाहरु घुंडा टेक्न बाध्य भए l श्रेष्ठ जसले नारी अत्याचार सहन सकेन र टुलुटुलु मुकदर्शक भएर कायरताको परिचय दिएन ,केवल महिला प्रति श्रद्दा भक्ति र चेलीबेटी प्रति देखाएको सम्मानले उनि सदैब हाम्रो हृदयमा छन् l

 

 

प्रश्न यहाँ एक नारीको हो ,नारीको लागि अन्जान दाजुले गरेको अदम्य साहसको कदर गर्दै ठुलो रकम दिदा पनि स्वीकार नगरी बैनी जस्तो ठानेको अभिव्यक्तिले बिष्णुको उचाई बढ्यो lगीद्दे दृस्टी राख्नेलाई ठुलो पाठ भयो र कानुनको कठघरमा आए lनारी प्रति गिद्दे दृस्टी राख्नेलाई कानुनको फन्दामा पर्ने छन् lनारी एक अभिभावक पनि हुन् आफ्नो ज्यान जोखिममा राखी अमेरिकाको कनेक्टिकट पाठशालामा २७ जनाको ज्यानमा आफ्नो प्राणको आहुति दिई साना साना बिद्यार्थीको ज्यान बचाईन lनारीको मुल्यांकन असिमित छ र उच्च छ lनारी प्रति देखाउनु पर्ने सद्भाव र श्रदाको खडेरी लागेको छ lनारीलाई केवल वस्तुसंग तुलना गर्न गर्ने सोच परिवर्तन गर्नु पर्ने हुन्छ l 

 

जब सम्म पितृसत्तात्मक समाज भन्ने सोच र चिन्तनको अन्त्य गर्न सबै समाज एक ढिक्का हुदैनन् तब सम्म नारीहरुलाई हेर्ने दृस्टीकोण तुलनात्मक रुपमा परिवर्तन हुदैन lमहिलाले पुरुषको सेवा गरे मेवा पाइन्छ भन्ने धार्मिक ग्रन्थहरूले पुस्तौंदेखि महिलालाई पुरुषको  अधीनमा राखेको पाइन्छ। जब सम्म महिलालाई शिक्षित र आर्थिक रुपमा सशक्तिकरण गरिने वातावरणको सिर्जना गरिदैन ,तब सम्म महिला सशक्तिकरणको मूल ढोका पुरै नखुल्ने हुन्छ lनेपाल सरकारले महिला हिंसा अन्त्यका लागि लैंगिक हिंसा मुक्त दिवस मनाउने घोषणा गरेको छ जो अत्यन्तै सराहनीय छ सर्वत्र चर्चाको बिषय भएको छ तर घोषणा र दिवस मनाउने कार्यक्रमले मात्र समस्याको हल नहुने हुन्छ यसको लागि पुरुषको ब्यबहार र सोचलाई जरा देखि उखाली फ्याल्नु पर्दछ l

 

अस्तु 

 

विजय थापा ,भर्जिनिया 

 

Dear Vijay Thapa jyu,

Doesn't your article contradict with staging of bar dancers at Nepali cultural program/ANA gathering?

Stop with your %%% bullshit. Its girls who want attention which the reason they wear short clothes.

kasto jamana!! ramro kura garne ko ta samai nai hoina jasto cha!!

It is people like thenepalibro who wants to be shot because they say nonsense things. Somebody make his wish come true. He is just taking up space on earth.

@metta No metta bro, My mother doesn't walk around showing her thighs and cleavage like your mother. If your mother goes around semi-nude, of course guys with look at her (gidde drishti).

Word!

Annehathaway, I agree with whatever you said 100% but as always there is a little more to think about.

We are human beings, a step above the animals yet animal instinct runs amok many times more than you'd think is warranted. There is such a thing as sexual attraction and you cannot deny that it starts from the flesh, specially for people who do not get to have as much sex as they want or any sex to be precise.

You are perfectly correct that any abuse is wrong and anything without consent is wrong but simply saying the rules does not undo the thousands of years of genetic programming that is thought to exist in order to continue the species. We humans have developed a lot and language has played an enormous role in defining what is right and what is wrong but still we have seen increasing number of rape and non consensual sexual activity specially initiated by the male involved.

So, although males know it is a punishable crime, they still do it and it continues to be a big problem in our civilized society. As I have stated earlier, it's the animal instinct, the sexual desire naturaly inherent to animals to continue their specy, that kicks in and horrendous crimes are committed.

These crimes are wrong, they take away personal freedom and they impact the freedom of women, but as we hear news everyday, it is not going away anytime soon.

So what is the solution?

In my opinion, the solution or perhaps a way to deal with the situation is to not to attract such unnecessary attention that could trigger undesirable desires on men who have lesser control on their animal instincts. Wearing revealing clothes may be a trigger for these men so perhaps being a little more conservative depending on where you are at, may be a good way to hope to keep the harmony intact.

I mean, this is a genetically programmed response and even though we live in a civilized society, it is apparently very difficult for seemingly normal men to control depending on the situation.

Am I condoning their behavior? No, not at all. These men are not fit to live in a civilized world and they should get the harshest punishment there is in the land. They do not have any right to impose themselves physically onto anyone.

But, reality of the situation is, there are these men around and you never know who will turn into one. Wearing revealing clothes are known to turn men on, and perhaps turn on their animal instinct to commit anti social crimes, so human rights, womens rights aside, I believe that it is just common sense to not wear too revealing clothes depending on where you are at.

And this is a reality check.

We are one step above animals and that is why you control your behavior.

Halo, ideally you are right but it is not happening so it might be a good idea to take necessary precautions.

In our society there are robbers, rapist, murderers. We cannot call for human rights if someone gets robbed walking in a poor neighborhood wearing gold chains, gold bracelets and diamond rings. What happened to him is wrong and the perpetrator is a criminal but it could have been preventedt by taking precautions ie. not wear such gold and diamond that is visible.

Rethink bro,

I get what you're trying to say, but in my opinion it doesn't hold up. If I take a leaf out of your argument on prevention and precautions, we might as well abort female foetuses, because that is the surest way to ensure that there is no rape of a woman right? Sounds extreme but you can stretch  that "Victim" argument anyway you like. How about accountability for your action for a second?

I don't know the rape statistics in the world, but I am pretty sure it is lower in western Europe and NZ where women have the most liberty, strong law against rape perpetrators, and where society values equality. Perhaps we should be striving along those lines , don't you think?

snurp "where women have the most liberty, strong law against rape perpetrators, and where society values equality"

You are talking about ideal situation. In Nepal, and India the situation is far from ideal and it will be a while till society reaches that kind of state. So until then, if you are a girl or woman, you might want to take precautionary measure than to be crying out about ideals.

As I said before - These men are not fit to live in a civilized world and they should get the harshest punishment there is in the land. They do not have any right to impose themselves physically onto anyone.

BUT my point is you have to get practical.

rethink,

I get to the gist of what you are trying to say - the society isn't going to change, so we might as well change how we dress-up/behave to appear less vulnerable. I agree that it is a preventative measure, but I don't necessarily agree that it is the solution though. The victims of sexual abuse are of all ages (I recently read an article when a 9 year old was raped). So isnt the solution to come up with the harshest laws possible and ensure their implementation? 

Also, re: the statements below:

"You are perfectly correct that any abuse is wrong and anything without consent is wrong but simply saying the rules does not undo the thousands of years of genetic programming that is thought to exist in order to continue the species."

"I mean, this is a genetically programmed response and even though we live in a civilized society, it is apparently very difficult for seemingly normal men to control depending on the situation."

Pardon my lack of knowledge on evolution (haven't read anything about it since eigth grade), but are the animal instincts to sexually abuse someone genetically engineered? Sexual attraction is one thing, but pouncing on someone to fulfill your sexual desires is a different story. I am not denying the fact that one is attracted to the opposite sex, but  the instincts to violate someone else's space and abuse them surely isnt genetic all the time (I don't know if it is ever genetic btw).

Annehathway

As you know, laws are not gonna change soon enough before many fall victim so obviously it is not a solution but a preventative measure at best.

There are sick people around so it would be naive to pretend and preach that everyone needs to respect others' space. There have been laws against it for a very long time but it keeps happening, so common sense and preventative measure would go a long way rather than to keep preaching to a choir.

Regarding genetics, noone is genetically inclined to force someone to have sex with them! 

All I am saying is that animals are genetically programmed to want to mate. So rest assured that you have not missed out on any new knowledge on evolution. But what differentiates a human from animal is the ability to comprehend and follow the basic laws of propriety. The instinct to violate someone else's space is not genetic but the instinct to mate is and thereby we are treading on a thin line of civility. My bet is to reduce the chances of that occurring as much as possible, including more stringent laws against the offenders.

I want to reiterate the example of being robbed when walking in a poor neighborhood displaying expensive jewellery or flashing cash around. There will always be people who don't have access to such cash or jewellery, and chances are there some people who will want to rob you out of it, so you should take precaution when walking in such areas. Of course, at the same time, you can ask for stringent laws against robbers, but you have to use common sense first for your own safety.

 नारिप्रति गिद्दे दृष्टि पक्कै राम्रो होइन (आफुले नलाएकै चै होइन फेरि ) तर दृष्टि नै लगाएन भने चै मानवजाति नै लोप हुने डरले गर्दा राम्रो दृष्टि लगाउने, आफुलाई कन्ट्रोल गरौ, अत्याधिक उत्साहित भएर केहि गलत कदम चै नउठाउ

Nepalibro with mouth full of shit speaks again. गुहुलाई चलाए गन्ध, so I refrain from replying to those donkeys nowon.

Rethink, how about the small kids and very old women? What is your view on that smartass? What is your view on attractive beauties? Do you think they should use burqa? We do have our own taliban, don't we?

yes nari chahe ma sundar aish ko roop pani lina sakcha

chaye ma durga ko pratik sita rai bhayera bhrasta bekti lai taha lagaunna ni pachi pardaina
nari chori ho, balika ho, wife ho, ama ho, granda ma ho, ani sita rai justo durge ni ho
tara sabai nari usto nahudho rahecha, some are just wolf with the face of sheep

k ho ma ta kabhi po bahye chu, wah bhai wah

Hey Metta, you said "Rethink, how about the small kids and very old women? What is your view on that smartass? What is your view on attractive beauties? Do you think they should use burqa? We do have our own taliban, don't we?"

You fail to get the main point and instead you want to sideline the main issue by injecting totally different religious and regional ideologies.

Everything aside, focus on this one to one analogy. If you have something that others covet but don't have, they can possibly rob you to get it. And they can rob a little kid or a old woman out of their jewelery if the perpetrators think they can get away with it. So my point is you don't want to be flashing off your jewellery or cash in a poor neighborhood.

If you are in a 5 star hotel party with good security and $100 entry fee to get in, then you can go and flash your jewellery and your cash. So it is just something that you have to be smart about where and how you do it.

If girls are in a nude beach then they can go bare and that's fine, if they are in a beach then flash your bikinis. But, if you are walking back in a street at night alone or with one friend in some dark street in kathmandu or india, or maybe even in some US ghettos, then perhaps you need to be smart enough not to dress up to arouse any kind of misbehaviour.

This is again another issue where idealism and realism needs to be understood. Ideally, it should be fine, but there are lot of anti social elements lying dormant all around us, ready to spring into action at any trigger they may perceive.